Change yourself, not your child
If you ask parents what kind of person they hope their child will grow up to be, today most would say they want him or her to be self-confident, capable of independent reasoning, and interested in learning new things on his or her own initiative. This seems a little "abstract," seeing as how it is not the children who need to change, but the attitude of the parents.
Han Shu-fang has a child in the first grade at the Caterpillar School. She says that before she sent her son there, her most frequent sentence to her child was "hurry up, hurry up."
When her child was in nursery school, relations between the mother and son were tense. Her son, who is left-handed, drew out his characters laboriously, while his mother looked over his shoulder with anxiety. "Eventually it got to the point where he couldn't even write a character if I was standing next to him."
"In the past I thought he was a burden to me, and couldn't live up to my standards. Now he is my mirror," says Han.
"Of course I originally wanted him to be a good student, to be well-mannered, and to be considerate to his parents," but the more demands that were made on him, the more extreme the reaction. "If I didn't change myself, what else could I do?" says one Forest School mom.
"If you want your kids to grow up to meet your expectations, the children will feel frustrated. If you let them develop on their own, and help them along, even if they turn out differently from you, isn't that good too?" asks Shen Hsiu-mei. Adds another mom, "the worst situation is one in which the parents simply don't know what to do and just waffle back and forth."
Parents, caught between liberality and conservatism, are wracked by inner struggles, conflicts, and anxiety. Chang Hsiao-hung, an associate professor at Taipei Teachers' College, has done a study of how parents of primary school students and primary school teachers understand education. He found the biggest gap between the two groups is in the area of "expectations of examination grades." Most teachers think expectations should be geared to the abilities of the student, while most parents just think "the higher the better."
Compared to the past, parents' attitudes are indeed changing. But it will be a long time before most of them thoroughly abandon the hope that their children will become nearly superhuman, as reflected in the Chinese saying, "may my child become a dragon."
[Picture Caption]
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In recent years there have been a number of educational experiments in Taiwan, With the growing number of choices, emigration is no longer the only alternative for parents disaffected with the traditional system. (photo by ChienYung-pin)
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The ancients "tied their hair to the beams and poked themselves with sticks" to keep from falling asleep while studying, so that they could pass the imperial examinations and become officials. Today's children bury their heads in a sea of books to pass the examinations to enter the next level of education.
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One of the major demands ot today's education reform is smaller classes in smaller schools.
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With efforts by a group of parents, the Caterpillar School finally opened its doors. Some parents here might be teachers,or administrators, or even volunteers.
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(left) What happened to the home of the Ami people? During extracurricular activity period, the children of the Tatun Primary School are taken on a journey in time by the Formosan Aboriginal Dance Troupe.
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(right) Both the Caterpillar and Forest schools are located far outside the big city. They enjoy beautiful scenery, though travel is somewhat inconvenient. The photo shows the Caterpillar campus, near Yentzu Lake in Hsintien.
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Extracurricular activities are exciting; the kids are happy, and so are the teachers.
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Kids of two-income households are often sent to after-school classes. They do homework, read, and experience another period of learning.
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What exactly is the best way to manage the children? This is a hot topic in the educational community. Does being sent into the hall for talking in class count as corporal punishment?
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Experimental classes don't stress grades, much less class rankings.
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Primary school children have stacks of home work. Is the load too heavy? This is a key question.
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Implementing education that respects children needs more than a concept, it requires concrete methods as well. This is where training of teachers for experimental classes comes in.
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Children need time and space to grow. What kind of person do you want your child to become?
Primary school children have stacks of home work. Is the load too heavy? This is a key question.
Implementing education that respects children needs more than a concept, it requires concrete methods as well. This is where training of teachers for experimental classes comes in.
Children need time and space to grow. What kind of person do you want your child to become?