誰到大陸結婚?

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1992 / 10月

文‧陳淑美



到大陸結婚的究竟是哪些人?具有哪些特質?

中央研究院社會科學研究所的研究員陳寬政的研究指出,去大陸結婚的在台配偶中,以外省籍、男性為主,且百分之八十以上跟原籍、乃至於同鄉的女性結婚。同省、同縣市的比例相當高,可能跟探親的活動、或父執輩的介紹有關。

研究並且顯示,兩岸婚配的型態中,老夫少妻比例相當高。若跟本地婚配比起來,本地夫妻的平均年齡差距為十歲,兩岸婚配則為廿歲。教育程度也是兩岸婚配的差距較大,且有女高於男、「往上娶」的現象。

陳寬政指出,一般人的擇偶行為,通常有相當程度的規律性,如男方的年齡、教育程度、社經地位較高等。但這並非法律或規約所強制規定,只是人們的約定俗成。

有時這些規律會改變,像人口遷徙、女性教育程度、及就業結構的改變,及相當程度的兩性年齡對比變化等都是原因。兩岸婚配的特性如果與一般習見的不同,應跟兩岸這幾年人口的遷徙有關。

是找伴侶?還是傭人

有些人認為,台灣的男孩會到大陸娶親,是因為台灣女生太「強悍」了。

一名有如花似玉老婆的在台配偶認為,隨著經濟、教育程度的提高,女性早已不再是傳統強調三從四德,對丈夫百依百順的妻子。因此台灣男人會到大陸找老婆,「台灣的女生要檢討」,他說得理所當然。

對大陸事務十分了解的律師邱彰,強烈指責這種說法。「他們要找共同生活的伴侶,還是佣人?」她問道。

也有人批評這是台灣男士父權心態的延伸。一名女性社團的負責人說,這跟當年美軍來台灣娶走小姐有何兩樣?

但也有人深表同情,認為去大陸娶妻的,多是在我們社會很難找到婚姻對象的「婚姻弱勢族群」。

接觸很多大陸配偶資料的陳寬政並不以為然。「重點在這些人想去大陸找到更好的另一半」,他說。據他的抽樣顯示,在兩岸婚配的案例中,類似漁民等婚姻弱勢族群的比例並不高。

兩岸婚配的另一個特徵是,當事人雙方認識、交往的時間都很短,多半很快就結婚了,可以說多半是「速成」婚姻。

「愛情」所至、金石為開?

這樣的婚姻基礎,加上兩岸目前的政治狀況、社會差異,會不會造成什麼問題?由於大陸配偶來台的時間尚短,目前尚不可知。不過,常接送各種大陸人士來來去去的境管局副局長劉蓬春不表樂觀。

他表示,從大陸小孩、老人到台灣的先例可做參考。這些人在台灣當然有愉快的例子,但多數適應得並不很好。「當初為了母親的居留問題而來找我的,如今只有一個媽媽留下」,他說。

上個月他接到一封信,是一位爺爺寫來的,要境管局千萬不要再讓他的孫子進來,「我當初想得太美好了,沒想到共產黨的意識形態如此厲害,會把我的孫子教成這樣一個我們完全無法相處的人」,這位七十多歲的老先生悲切地說。劉蓬春表示,像這樣的例子,據他的接觸可說比比皆是。

愛情的力量是否會比較大?就只能等時間證明了。

相關文章

近期文章

EN

Who Goes to the Mainland to Marry!

Jackie Chen /tr. by Christopher Hughes


Who goes to mainland China to get married? What are the special characteristics of such people?

Research undertaken by Chen Kuan-cheng, a researcher at Academia Sinica's Sun Yat-sen Institute for Social Sciences and Philosophy, points out that those who go from Taiwan to mainland China to get married are mostly males from families with roots in Chinese provinces other than Taiwan. Over 80 percent of these people get married to women from the same town as that from which their own families originated. The proportion of marriages between people whose families go back to the same province, county or city is correspondingly high, which could well be linked with the activity of going back to visit relatives or introductions arranged through the parental generation.

Research also reveals a high rate of older grooms marrying younger brides in cross-strait marriages. This can be compared with the age differences in marriages between natives of Taiwan province, where the gap between bride and groom is on average 10 years, while in cross-strait matchings it is 20 years. The gap in levels of education in cross-strait matchings is also comparatively large with that of women being higher than men--a phenomenon of "marrying up."

Chen Kuan-cheng points out that most people select a marriage partner according to a pattern of regular rules, such as the age of the man, his degree of education, and social and economic status all being comparatively high. This is certainly not due to legal or contractual regulations, but rather just the informal result of agreements reached between people.

At times these rules can change, with population movements, the degree of women's education, and the structure of employment being important factors in altering the comparative ages and other elements between the two sexes. If cross-strait marriages differ from the norm, this should be related to the movement of people over the Strait in the past few years.

Partners or maids?: Some people think that men from Taiwan get married to in mainland China because the women of Taiwan are too "demanding."

One man, who has married a wife "like flowers and jade" in Taiwan, thinks that following the raising of economic and educational standards women do not put the traditional stress on obedience, virtue and being wives who depend on and revere their husbands. It is because of this that the men of Taiwan go to mainland China to find wives. "Taiwanese women should take a good look at themselves," he says with an all-too-obvious logic.

Chiu Chang, a lawyer with a good understanding of the affairs and situation in mainland China, condemns such thinking, asking, "Do they want to find a partner to share their life or a maid?"

There are also those who are critical of what they see as an extension of the chauvinistic, paternal attitudes held by men in Taiwan. One organizer of a women's group asks how such attitudes differ from those of the American soldiers who used to come to Taiwan and marry young women.

Yet there are also people who express sympathy and think that men who go to mainland China to find a bride are mostly members of a "tribe" who are unable to find marriage partners in Taiwan.

With access to a lot of information concerning cross-strait marriages, Chen Kuan-cheng says this is not necessarily so, maintaining, "The important point is that these people want to go to the mainland to find a better partner." According to his samples, the rate of cross-strait marriages for members of weak groups, such as fishermen, is not high.

Is love the answer?: Another special characteristic of cross-strait marriages is that the period for the two sides to get to know each other is very short. Most get married very quickly in what could be called "instant" marriages.

With marriages built on this kind of foundation, in addition to the present disparities between the political and economic situations across the Strait, what kind of problems can arise? Because those people who got married in the mainland and then came to Taiwan have only been living here together for a short time, it is hard to say at present. However, Liu Peng-chun, deputy commissioner of the Entry and Exit Service Bureau, who has received and seen off all kinds of people from mainland China, is not optimistic.

Liu says that the cases of children and old people who have been the first to come over from the Chinese mainland can be used for reference. Of course, some of these people have been very happy to be in Taiwan, but there have also been many who cannot adjust very well. "At first people would come to find me concerning problems about how their mothers could stay here, but only one mother has actually stayed," he says.

Last month Liu received a letter from a grandfather who on no account wanted the Entry and Exit Service Bureau to allow his grandchildren to enter Taiwan. "My first thoughts were too good," wrote the embittered septuagenarian. "I never thought the bearing of the Chinese Communists could be so powerful as to teach my grandchildren to be such unmanageable people." According to Liu's contacts, such cases are common.

Can the power of love prove stronger? We can only wait for time to tell.

 

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